Each episode starts with a tragic diagnosis but in the end it’s really just hypochondria.
1) Actually wake up early enough to watch the parade.
2) Overcome imminent disappoint caused by parade.
3) Watch every Friends Thanksgiving episode nonstop, in order, followed by the King of Queens Thanksgiving episode in which Nick Offerman appears, and other King of Queens episodes.
4) Watch either Goodfellas or The Deer Hunter.
5) Eat food specially made for my picky eating.